The Big Bad Styckerin
by Sir. Coffe
Summary: A humorous story about three Harry Potter related characters.


Once, long ago, or not so long ago, I don't know the specifics, there lived an eighteen year old boy who still lived in his mother's basement. This boy's name was Gryffinstraw. One day his mother, Dumbledora the Explorer, said to him, "Honey, I think you need to visit your sister Brickenclaw sometime. In fact, why don't you go and stay over at her place for a while? I'm sure she'd love to have you over."

"Sure mum!" replied Gryffinstraw as he put on his red hoodie and packed a bag full of clothes and video games. "I'll be back in a few days. Bye!" Gryffinstraw happily trotted outside his mother's house as she locked the door on him and immediately started clearing out all of his possessions.

~

On the path to his sister's house, he decided to grab her some wild berries as an 'Iwanttocomeinsideyourhousepleasedontlockmeoutlikelasttime' gift. Along the side of the path he met a wolf (his brother Styckerin in a bad cosplay outfit). "Hello Mr. Wolf," he smiled.

"Hello, Gryffinstraw," replied the 'wolf'. (Of course Gryffinstraw saw nothing strange about a talking wolf that looked like a ripped up teddy and knew his name). "Are you lost?"

"Oh, no," said Gryffinstraw "I know where to go! I need to continue up that path over there, take my first left and then my second right, and then it's the house made out of red bricks!"

"Of course," smiled the 'wolf', as he slowly backed away. Gryffinstraw found nothing strange about this situation at all, and continued along the path.

Meanwhile the 'wolf' was taking a shortcut to Brickenclaw's house. Brickenclaw simply looked outside and sighed. "Stupid Gryffinstraw led him straight to my house AGAIN," she murmured. "And I just finished unpacking my stuff, too. May as well hide in the cupboard again..." She picked up a pile of books and a torch, then hid inside her cupboard and shut the door, leaving a plate of fresh-baked donuts on the counter.

Styckerin poked his head through the window and looked around, "Ha! nobody's home" he cackled. "The doughnuts are mine!"

Outside, Gryffinstraw heard all of this and decided to go hero mode. "Ha! You won't get away with this Mr. Wolf!" he shouted as he tackled Styckerin to the ground.

~

Huffypuff was walking in the forest on her Girl Scout mission, when she heard a high pitched scream in the distance. "Oooh," she said. "Customers!" She ran up to Styckerin who was standing triumphantly over the dazed figure of Gryffinstraw. "Would you like some firewood?" she asked, "I had cookies, but I ate, *cough cough,* fed them to the starving animals! Anyway, firewood is harder to eat,"

"Yes, I suppose it is," muttered Styckerin, staring down at the bite marks on the wood. "Anyway, I don't want any firewood, I'm busy stealing some doughnuts." Huffypuff looked down at her pamphlet.

"Hmm," she said. "My pamphlet says here that in emergencies, you have to hit the bad guys with large objects!" She smiled and nodded towards her axe. "My axe is pretty big, isn't it?" Styckerin trembled in fear.

"Look here girl, I'm, ah, not looking for any-"

"ROOOOOOOAAAAAR! HUFFYPUFF DESTROY!"

~

Styckerin ran for his life *cough cough* made a tactical retreat. Brickenclaw poked her head out of the cupboard. "What now?" she whispered to Gryffinstraw, who had escaped from Styckerin and was hiding inside the cupboard with his sister. He scowled at her.

"You figure it out, you're the smart one!"

After Styckerin had run off into the distance, Huffypuff wandered into Brickenclaw's house. She smiled at the two siblings, who were still cowering in the cupboard. "Hello! I'm Huffypuff. Can I have some of those doughnuts?"

Brickenclaw nervously glanced at her brother. "Well you see, there's not really enough for three people-"

Huffypuff slowly moved her hand towards her axe. "What if I said please?"

**Moral: Instead of stealing, just ask politely. It helps if you're holding a big axe.  
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**A/N: All characters belong to JK Rowling.**

_Edited by The Little Chibi_****

**Also: Please leave a review, it makes me happy when I know people enjoyed it (:**


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